Sweden – Easy-to-assemble, affordable but missing a load-bearing screw
Sweden’s team can be summed up in four simple words. No Zlatan, no party.
Football’s version of Steven Segal has hung up his boots and followed the likes of Eric Cantona into the world of adverts and self-promotion. Without him, you can’t really see how the Swedes will excite.
An aging sqaud, with only 3 players under 25, relying on defence inspires me to excellence about as much as an Ikea manual. None of the squad play domestic football in their homeland and one of their most promsing exports, Victor Lindelof, comes into the tournament off the back of a mixed first season with Manchester United.
Solid and dependable but more than a few creaking hinges.
Design & Branding
How could you possibly describe Swedish style as anything other than sleek, clean, modern and simple?
The Swede’s stick to what they know in what is a subtle evolution of their previous kit.
A canary-yellow kit offers subtle diagonal piping with a elegant blue collar. It doesn’t carry the prestige of the yellow of Brazil but it’ll still draw a second glance. A football-hipster’s dream.
A solid effort but more for the 5-a-side pitch than the World Stage.
Sweepstake Pick: Sean Cullinane
"Gimme, Gimme, Gimme a win after midnight"
After looking high and low through the web, or the first 2 pages of Google, I can say with mild confidence that there don’t appear to be any official social accounts for the Swedish football team.
And just like your favourite have-go TV pundit, I’m instantly proven wrong when I stumble upon their Instagram account. Which in turn links to their Facebook page. 🙈
Possibly playing right into the hands of football fans, showing pictures with minimal words, the Swede’s Iinstagram does a great job of covering up the fact that last four match results have ended in 0-0 draws.
It does so by giving followers an insight into the rock n’ roll life of a Swedish international.
Breaks from tradition but not actually much to cheer about.
Remarkably, or rather un-remarkably actually, Sweden has never hosted a major football tournament. If the Eurovision is anything to go by though (Sweden in the only country to host the event in five different decades) it’s fair to say it could make a decent fist of it.
Their fans tend to be the perfect role models and it wouldn’t be a world cup without an attractive female Swedish fan making an appearance on the big screens (prays my wife doesn’t read this).
Argubably their strongest area and let’s be honest…who doesn’t love a good Abba sing-a-long?
Crunchy on the inside, smooth on the outside. A little bit like a Daim bar, there’ll be a decisive snap when applied with pressure.